I’m just about there – the point of no return – all I have to do is make it through this evening without screaming at a cocktail sausage or diced cheese. I love food, as you can tell from my waist line (such as it is), but there is a saturation point where you start a boring old sandwich or a fresh plate of pasta instead of the meat feast that we’ve had over the last two weeks. Party food and Christmas fayre is great but breaking point is nigh.
It’s no wonder that plenty folk put weight on over the break, but the good news is that the average person also loses around 5lbs of it again naturally, so don’t worry about your work clothes being a bit “nippit” on Monday. And it’s the reason we all head to the supermarket in our droves to hoover up the fruit and veg, the healthy snacks, cereal bars and such like just to feel normal again. Also there is the distinct lack of water, fruit juice and smoothie (unless you count the alcoholic versions of each…) that plays havoc with your digestive system. Your arse must wonder what’s wrong that first week back to work when it is also awoken from it’s holiday and gets back to full time work.
But for many tonight and even next weekend there are the final parties and catch ups and the inevitable plates of party food. Everyone tries to do things differently these days to give their guests a different option from everyone else which does save us all from the cocktail stick smorgasbord we all grew up with – mind you I do still enjoy one. For me the biggest danger is not the 1970s style hedgehog, but instead the evil that is Pringles. I love Pringles, that’s the problem. You stick a tube of the Prawn cocktail or BBQ ones in front of me and I’ll happily/sickly finish the whole thing over the course of a night. Even the flavours I’m not as keen on like Sour Creme and Chive or the Original ready salted ones can lead to a sore stomach as the MSGs in them are soooooo morish. Even worse is if you have bought in for a party you are hosting yourself, for some reason you won’t put out your favourite flavours – instead you save them for yourself which is madness! Thankfully I’m not a dipper. I’ve never been the biggest fan of all the dips that accompany these crisp-like snack otherwise I’d be twice the size I am now.
You know things are getting bad when you are craving things like a banana or a plate of veg, fresh soup or flavoured water instead of fizzy juice and crisps and chocolate. That’s another surprise when you have kids, just how much chocolate appears in your house. Now as a responsible parent I, along with my good lady wife, ensure that our children have as balanced a diet as possible. This means we must, as our duty to that commitment of a healthy lifestyle, help them reduce that pile by hiding much of it away as soon as it is opened. We will than force ourselves to eat our way through the said pile to make sure we are doing the best by our kids. You never thought you’d hear yourself say you were sick of chocolate but…
So here’s to the Vitamin Water, healthy lunches and proper cooked teas from Monday. Until then I’ve several selection boxes to “hide” from my kids.